Lately I’ve run into a lot of quotes about how to empower my life.
How to stop dreaming and take action instead.
To find my passion and purpose in life.
Find and live my ideal life.
I’m in charge of my life.
Fantastic quotes and advice, right?
Except - not for me.
I’m an Aspie (living with Aspergers Syndrom) - granted, in the lighter end of the scale, but it’s still a challenge every day.
If I should follow all these - lets call them “rules” - I’d be sitting in the corner of a patted cell within hours.
Because they all require me to be out and about among other people one way or the other.
And if there’s something I’m really bad at, it’s that - socializing.
And they are all too vague.
I have a full time job - maybe not a dream job - but it pays the rent and I like it and my colleagues.
And I’m good at my job - I help young people with Asperger get internships in IT companies.
The only way I can do that is to preserve all my mental - sometimes even physical - energy from my spare time home alone.
And I really mean alone. No friends or other people come into my home after work and I don’t go out - I need to recharge.
Even then I sometimes come home totally drained and collapse on my bed with tears running.
Now imagine if I should start living my dreams - take action.
Dreams are all well and dandy, but not everyone can live them.
Personally that would mean, I have to quit my job, move somewhere else and hope for the best.
It also requires money!
Maybe not easy but doable, you say…
Not for an Aspie.
Even if I have all the money in the world and people to make all my decisions and all I had to do, was to follow.
I just can’t.
We need clarity, we need to know what will happen every hour of the day. We need clear direction of things to do and to know what the outcome hopefully will be.
But surely you can do it in a small scale, you say…
Uh huh. And I do, but probably not the way everyone else think of it.
I goof around, I sing snippets of songs and make others continue it… all to get a reaction I can actually relate to. Laughs and smiles.
That’s what gets me through a tough day, where my reserves are low.
At the same time I spread a little happiness around, which makes me feel good. :)
I don’t really have any passions or purpose in life.
I don’t need to prove myself to anyone.
I have no ambitions other than being good at what I do right now.
I don’t “need” other people (which is the only thing, most don’t get - and most hurtful to them).
I’m perfectly happy with my life as it is.
I’ve found my place in this world….
That doesn’t stop me from dreaming of other things though - the only difference is, I know I’ll never get to live those dreams and I’m fine with it.
I applaud those people, that change their life by following these “rules”
All the power to you! :)
Thanks for reading - now let me get back to my little dark den of loneliness ;-)
However, she is married to a priest and has a teenage boy, so it’s not without problems.
This film has everything that a lesbian could wish for in a movie.
Great story, believable characters, sensual filming, the longest kiss in movie history - EVER, two sex scenes that are first class filmed and not over or understated.
The second scene where Peyton gets an orgasm (the camera zoomed in on her face), beats Meg Ryan’s scene in “When Harry met Sally” with several thousand lengths.
Simply A Must See!
PS: Can’t believe it took so long for me to find it and watch it - on Netflix.